Dasypus Novemcinctus All Up In Your Grill!

The Hornsby Bend Biosolids Management Plant on the outskirts of town is also home to the Hornsby Bend Bird Observatory. We went out there today in search of a good walk. There are an incredible number of bird species out there even now, in "winter." I like birds as much as the next guy does. This is not what I am excited about today.

There is the sewage treatment plant, with its attached collect ponds brimming with...well, filth. Definitely different, and interesting, and smelly. It is not a super thrill for me.

No, the thing that got me was this. In all my years, I have only seen a living armadillo once. Until this afternoon.

I've seen scores of dead armadillos. I've also seen a bunch that are alive for just a second, before that minivan, or that Accord, or that whatever squashes the living shit out of 'em. I don't count those times, because you can't really get to know what a critter is like if it's always dead right after you spot it.

It turns out armadillos are pretty cute. I saw at least 5 living 'dillos this afternoon, during our stinky nature hike. They'll walk right up on you, as they seem to have poor eyesight, and their hearing is only so-so at best. Even their sense of smell is meh, so they just stand there in front of you, sensing that something is screwy, but not quite able to put it all together. The minute they do figure it out...voom! They totally jump and scamper the hell away, with their little shell a-flappin' in the wind. It's very funny to see. It fills my heart with blood, just thinking about it.

Today was a day for the armadillo! It is one of my new favorite animules. I love the little rabid, leprosy vectors. They make me glad to carry a camera around with me, at least.

Here are the tunes for the armadillos, past and present. One day, you will win your holy war against the tires, axles and bumpers of America's cars. Until then, I salute you!

-[Hamburger Martyr]-

Killdozer : Hamburger Martyr
No Means No : Manic Depression
Stickmen with Rayguns : Scavenger of Death
Art of Noise : Into Batttle
Enemy Soil : Hypocrisy
Scratch Acid : Flying Houses
Men's Recovery Project : Restraining Order
Goblin : Suspiria
Bauhaus : Double Dare
Da Toddlers : Toddlin' Sickness
Monster X : Got the Guts?
Thrones : MNMNTN
Sick Things : Paranoia
Dwarves : Let's Get Pregnant
Beguiled : The Screaming Rummy
Reagan Youth : Degenerated
Didjits : Beast Le Brutal
Skinny Puppy : To a Baser Nature
People Like Us : Nobody Loves U
Killdozer : Big Song of Love
Unsane : HLL
Stretcheads : Groin Death
Cherubs : Wornout Balls
Heresy : In Silence
Damned : Neat Neat Neat

"They reel to and fro, and stagger like a drunken man, and are at their wit's end."

Whoah!

I've got this tasty compilation that is just itching like crazy to be downloaded by someone out there. This is music from somewhere else. Many of the song titles are en Español. A majority of the tracks on here are instrumental, all are pleasant to listen to. Do not tarry. You must have this now, to help you dance and sway. OK?

{Old Farts IV}

Los Weelers: Yerba Verde
Juan El Matematico: La Hey Del Hielo
Harry Breuer & His Quintet: Minute Merengue
Medallions: Blowin' Through Yokohama Part 2
Alma Llanera: No Vuelvas A Querrer
Carlos Montoya: La Rosa
Dick Schory's Percussion Enesemble: Typee
Los Beatnicks: Que Paso con Jon
Rudy Ventura: Ojos Negros, Cielo Azul
Pachengueanda: Do Gozami Charanga
Dirty Three: Sometimes I Just Don't Want to Know
Tipsy: Nude on the Moon
Criterions: Island Fever
Ivan Ward & the Swingsters: Congo Slide
Ralf & Florian: Ananas Symphonie
Dick Hyman: Under Paris Skies
Banda Tarapaca: Caballeros Cruzados
Lester Williams: I'm So Glad
Ruth Welcome: Memories are Made of This
Dick Dale & the Del-Tones: Tidal Wave
Kazbek Orchestra: Pojezd Istambowa
Mariachi of Acapulco: La Negra
Riz Ortolani: Cargo Cult
Mel Blanc: Son of a...

"There's No Justice, There's Just Us!"

Ahhh. Finally, a quiet moment alone with the computer.

It looks like many of my favorite music blogs have got some kind of holiday funtime music posts on them. Myself, being several days late and many dollars short, will forgo this opportunity to do the same. I have shot my xmas wad and no longer care to dwell on it, except to say this. I feel very strongly that after suffering under the constant barrage of lousy xmas music for the last three months or so, everyone needs a palate cleanser.

Earlier today I pulled this compilation out from under my car seat.

"Oh boy!" I said, to no one in particular. "I've missed this one!"

Then I turned it over. "Yikes!" Scratch City.

I feel exceptionally lucky (I really like this comp) in that, even though the disc that I pulled this music from was in terrible, terrible shape, there are no skips or rotten spots. Lucky for you too, I guess.

I put this together on October 4th, 2003. The day after the tragedy. Never forget! It's my tribute, because Wire made a song called "Ex-Lion Tamer", and because that's all it takes to name a comp. I am very lazy.

Tiger-inflicted arterial blood geysers of joy, right this way!

~:Ex-Lion Tamer:~

crash
Leadbelly - Hesitation Blues
Country Teasers - Mosquito
Dawson - Infamous Toughies/Infinite Toffees
Joy Division - Passover (live)
The Clash - What's My Name
X - Hate City
Motards - Spare Change
Wire - Ex-Lion Tamer
Dils - Class War
The Buttocks - Deutsche raus aus Deutschland
Appendix - Envy
Thee Headcoats - Paedophile
Mystery Dates - World War 3 (is calling me)
Angry Samoans - Lights Out
Amdi Petersen's Arme' - Anarkie/Hierarki
Avengers - Car Crash
Agnostic Front - Blind Justice
Bad Brains - Pay to Cum
SS Ultrabrutal - Bomben Splitten
Radio Birdman - You Gonna Miss Me
Necros - Be a Man
Steelpole Bathtub - Hey Bo Diddley
Misfits - Hellhound
Exploding White Mice - Sea of Justice
Eater - I Don't Need It
Thee Headcoats - What's My Name
Flat Duo Jets - Love Has Its Joke Sometimes
crashout

Pop Sputter.

Today, I am going to use my tiny platform to advance the agenda of another of my longtime favorite bands, the Severed Heads. I saw them live once (in 1990), with the right kind of eyes. They very nearly melted my fragile mind with their mild manners and their over-the-top video synthesizer.

The name makes them seem like a death metal band or something. They are decidedly not.

"Richard decided we would become Severed Heads, his tongue firmly in his cheek. A tactless, idiotic name. We would be 'industrial', as that was the flavour of the month. So we set about being industrial each day after school. There were plenty of models - Throbbing Gristle, Cabaret Voltaire, The Normal et al. We admired and mocked them equally. "

Much of what they have created over the years is short-circuited pop music. Twinkly, charming little electric pop shards that are good at making the Krotpong happy. You get where I'm going with this, right? I made this comp...etc.

I have to tell you... this is some weird stuff. Trippy and bright electronics, minor chords, tape loops, drum machines, variable speeds, phase shifting, stuttering oddness... it's all mixed up together and pumped out. Pop music sausage! The noisy sometimes threatens to overwhelm the pretty parts, though it never quite does. It's a little bit (!) techno, but they are very nice about it.

Have a listen! Where is the tracklist? Why, it's in the comments!

Sunday Morning Coming Down.

In these last, chaotic days leading up to the new year, the people need a tonic for the terrible stress induced by this relentless holiday triumvirate. It's supposed to be a tranquil time, not a tremendous torrent of tapir turds.

My least favorite aspect of this season is the sensation of time slip-slip-slipping away. There is always so much to do, and never enough time in the world to do it all. Cooking and cleaning, shopping and shipping, traveling and treeing, planning and partying. There is so much stuff to do (still!) that my mind, it boggles.

It will all be done (or done with) eventually. In just a couple of weeks, even! Then we all start making our way back around the big circle, just to do it all over again (in the same last-minute fashion we did it last year), until we're dead.

In order to soothe the savaged soul I have selected a special series of songs, both silly and somber, from the always scintillating Handsome Family. One loverly track, from each of their records currently in my possession. Quiet and sweet, these tunes could take you away for a little while, and return you unharmed.

You've got a few minutes... Come on, do it!

Forward into Soft Darkness.

I stopped on my bike to take this picture from the I-35 overpass. It was 4:00 am and maybe a little foggy. It's not a fantastic picture or anything, but fog is creepy and weird. I am creepy and weird. Therefore, the picture must be taken.


This is a picture of the singer for Forward, a hardcore band from Japan. They are incredibly wonderful live. If you ever have an opportunity to see them, do so.

Between many of the songs in their live set, the singer would saunter up to the edge of the stage and grunt out "I don't speak any English... Fuck you!" Sheer poetry, coupled with the jams being kicked out, motherfucker. It was a beautiful evening.

Here I have posted their 2004 album, Burn Down the Corrupted Justice. This is some fearsome hardcore, well produced and totally catchy, performed at the height of the band's superpowers. Extra points if you break something while you listen to this.

Mark'll Sink Us.

I love the Fall. I caught some of their videos on Night Flight somewhere around 1987, and my mind was horribly blown by this weird "new" music. I've been a fan ever since.

After all these years of fandom, I have only been able to to see them play twice, in Austin. I was lucky in that they were great both times (they are not a very consistent live unit).

The second time I saw them, frontman Mark E. Smith was recovering from a broken hip, and remained seated at a table on the stage throughout the short set. It was brief, but lively. After the show in Houston (the night after the Austin show), Mark canceled the rest of the tour, leaving only this statement:

"The Group / New

York Agency
+ Tour
Manager
are too
lazy to
play.
50% refund
to all ticket
holders. M.E. Smith"

One thing is for certain, Mark E. Smith is a colossal dick.

As for you, I have a recording of this second Austin show. Which I will share with you... now. Tracklist is in the comments section.

A Record that I Love.

Hi. Let's talk about some Puff Tube, ok?

First off, there is hardly any information on Puff Tube. No Wikipedia page. No Myspace. The Google is fairly useless. I think there is a member of Prisonshake in there, somewhere. Their single came out in 1991. Here is a tidbit, a trifle, a totally tiny taste from the old, cached Scat records site:

"Between 1989 and 1992 six issues of Seven magazine were published, each with a 45. This is the only issue there are still copies of, which is good because it's the best of the lot. Reading my old reviews makes me cringe, but there's a lot of good art in here (loose postcards, napkins, comics), Mike DeCapite's fiction, a piece on Cle label-collective St. Valentine's, and the Emergency Peanut double 7" by the mighty Puff Tube, who are every bit as ridiculous as their name. Hours of entertainment!"

Amazingly, there are still copies of this left for sale on the internet, at rock-bottom prices, just look. So cheap! If you have a turntable... Well, it just makes sense to own this.

As for the music, the words "sublimely retarded "come to mind. It's the wacky band a manic cartoon character might form, just to harass a hapless adversary. A kind of mutant Kick-Ass Rock and Roll, writ small. With toy instruments. Recorded in a room filled with helium and nitrous oxide. It jumps all over the place, bopping and squeaking. And just like that... it's over. Poof! Where did it go? I miss it already!

20 minutes 41 seconds of pure audio joy, served up fresh and hot, just for you! Track list is in the comments.

Eyes That Follow.

This is a recording that I made of this Japanese band, the Crude. They were one of the golden performances at the Chaos in Tejas IV (a local hardcore festival). I had no preconceived notions about them, only what I had heard from a couple of comp trax. I just figured that they would play some hardcore.

At first, they noodled... and noodled. Over ten minutes' worth! I thought to myself, "Oh, maybe they're a prog band now. I should throw this trash can on stage. What could be more hardcore than being a total dick at a show? Perhaps it's finally my turn to be that guy, the guy that fucks up the show for everyone. Yeah. It's my turn to get some! Yeah! Look out you pigs, here's me!" I was gearing myself up for my big moment. My big, sweaty, shining moment. I had my hand on the trash can and was dragging it across the floor, ready to hurl it with all of my glorious strength. When all of a sudden, they started to play so fast, and so crazy that I just had to stop and watch them spill their guts out.

After a while, I forgot all about that trash can.

The recording is appropriatlely noisy and ruff. It is one track. Don't worry, it's pretty short. Tracklist? Please. Even if I did know it, I probably wouldn't tell you.

"I am a Giant Dork..."

Hi! I'm also dirty bootlegger scum!

Another reason I love technology is the Olympus Digital Voice Recorder WS-300M. It's a tiny thing. Rectangular, about the size of a brick cellphone. Thinner, lighter (about 4 ounces with aaa battery), easy to hide. Add a Sony ECM-717, a stereo mini-microphone about the size of a tablespoon of butter sliced off the old butterstick, with a slender three foot cord to attach everything together, and you have a modern primitive bootlegging/surveillance rig. It's small enough to sneak into the odd show or two, and large enough to get you instantly killed by the mafia.

This here is a decent quality live recording that I made of those lovable little scamps, the Country Teasers. They were captured alive, at Emo's in Austin, in 2004. As for post-production, I artlessly chopped the audio file up into 12 segments, with an intro of me gabbing at various people while the band does a last minute tune up, for an unlucky 13 tracks in all.

The recording is very noisy, but appealingly so. Their records are pretty lo-fi and raw as it is, so the shitty sound is actually to their benefit. Even with the roughness, it still sounds better than many of the audience recordings I have heard over the years.

One of the crowd voices on this is Martina, from Prague, who once tried to pull my mailbox out of the wall during a party.

Me: Why are you doing that?
Martina: (with her hands still on the mailbox) I don't know.
Me: Well, stop it.
Martina: Ok. (lets go of mailbox)

There are other voices in the crowd that a few of you may recognize. I let you make your guesses...

Country Teasers Live at Emo's, 2004.

Babbler
Deaths
Good Looking Boys or Women
Hairy Wine II
Hitlers and Churchills
Man V. Cock
Mosquito
Please Ban Music
Points of View
Spiderman in the Flesh
Success
TODTLL
White Patches

Splinter Edit.

The mix I am putting up today is from an ancient mixtape that I made when I had a cheap mixer, two turntables and a cd player. Think 1995 or 1996. I digitized it and edited it down in 2003, if I remember correctly. The tracklist is your guess is as good as mine. I recognize about 25% of it. Louis Armstrong is on it (the track is a little wobbly). Steve Fisk figures pretty heavily into it. Étant Donnés are representing. Appendix is on there as one of the few actual songs. Entre Vifs shows up somewhere. Ryuchi Sakamoto has a supporting role. There is a Prince Far-I dub track. Groucho Marx is there for just a second. Hey, there's the Fall. There is some classical music... Everything else is either something that sounds familiar (but I have no idea what it could be) , or a complete mystery.

It's a sound collage. Listening to it now, well, I still really like it. It's very odd, this mix. Some of the distortion you hear was caused intentionally by me, because my equipment was horrid and easily fuck-withable. Think of it as a bonus. A rare, weird something that is exclusive to this mix.

This is one of the few actual mixtapes I made that survived all the years of total and complete neglect that I dished out. I leave it here for you.

Wretched Excess.

"I come to bury Caesar, not to praise him;
The evil that men do lives after them,
The good is oft interred with their bones,
So let it be with Caesar ..."

I have just now returned from a lovely wedding in Las Vegas, Nevada. I had never been out there before, so it was all fresh and new to me. I had a great, and very interesting, time. I'd like to state for the record that I am no gambler. I did play some of the games. I won. I lost. I won. I lost.

Thirty bucks in the hole was where it stood at the airport. Not too shabby for having gone to something like 12 casinos. Vegas is a giant money vacuum.

I have long been fascinated by the concept of Las Vegas, from its humble beginnings as an organized criminal venture, sanctioned by the State of Nevada, on up through the Fear and Loathing of Hunter S. Thompson (which I read again while I was there). I knew that the Vegas of yore was long gone years ago, but I had no idea how gone it really was.

Real gone.

If a casino gets too old or run down on the Strip, well, goodbye. Knock it down and scrape the earth until no trace remains. In its place will be built a super behemoth casino, nicer and more opulent than any casino ever built. Ever! In the end , even if they make it a Super Nice Class Sextuple AAA Palatial Gambling Center, it's still a casino. All the games are the same as every other casino on the Strip. Gambling, food, drink, and titty, that's what you get.

Clark County, Nevada really offers nothing to the casual tourist but the chance to (rarely) strike it rich. And to buy shit. And hookers. And that's pretty much it. There are some thrills to be had, I guess, if any of that stuff is your bag. But doesn't offer anything really tangible, just greed and gluttony for the dead-eyed potato people (Hey, it just happens. You play video poker for an hour or three, see if you don't end up looking a little zombified). It's the world's largest sin shopping mall, and it's far more obnoxious than you could ever imagine. I mean, I had no idea...

Honestly, I was entertained by just about everything presented to me. To the point of total exhaustion, which is where I am, currently. I spent a lot of my time just watching everyone. It's an intriguing microcosm of like-minded individuals milling around, doing the vice thing. They were the happy, sad, pretty, ugly, young, old, totally wasted humans of every hue, shape and size, and they were all cuttin' it loose, Vegas style. It's amazing.

If you have never been, you should go at least once, just to see it all unfold in front of you. If you have been there you already know what it's all about. I can't tell you nothin'.

The linky for today is a lecture by Hunter Thompson at Boulder University back in 1977, in all his mumbly glory. Pictures from the trip are here if'n you want a look-see.

Word Violence.

It's not just music that makes me a better person. It takes comedy as well. Occasionally, I need a little black humor to supplement my protein-rich diet of grinding thrash and soul-devouring noise, just to keep my balance. It's like bran in audio form. Bran for the soul. Hmm. This isn't looking too good. Let's start again...

Sometimes, there is the funny. Almost all comedians have to be funny, otherwise they're just "storytellers," or "poets," or "performance artists," or "terrible." Being funny puts the food on the comic's table, the "bread and butter," as it were. I'm sure even some of the more horribly offensive comics want to entertain and retain their audiences, when all is said and done. To maintain the balance of being controversial without being too controversial. It can be a fine line. I mean, who would want to actively drive their audiences away? Not a sane, career-oriented individual, certainly.

With that in mind, at the other end of this link is a performance by Bill Hicks. This show has many of his standard bits, and includes some I have never heard before. Which is nice, if you're a fan. There are also a lot of hecklers, and he hurls some pretty horrific abuse on them. Hicks really goes off the deep end several times, coming off more frightening than funny. Here is what Wikipedia had to say about it:

In a gig in Chicago during 1989, later released as the bootleg "I'm Sorry, Folks", resulted in Hicks screaming possibly his most infamous quote, "Hitler had the right idea, he was just an underachiever" to a heckler shouting "Free Bird" over and over. Hicks followed this remark with a misanthropic tirade calling for unbiased genocide against the whole of humanity, suggesting that it was not an anti-Semitic comment but rather an expression of his disgust with humanity in general. Hicks often veered between hope and love for the human race and utter hopelessness. He would often unsarcastically refer to humans as "God's perfect and holy children" while in the same performance suggesting that humans were turds.

I have actually seen a terrible quality video of this blistering verbal show of force. It is brutal and ugly. Also, very very funny. If you ever have a chance to watch it, you should.

As for the audio portion, if you decide to listen to this at work, I suggest the use of headphones. To say that the language was salty would be a gross understatement.

"I think the obvious question everyone has is who takes loaded weapons into a Toys "R" Us?"

Do you know when I first heard Chri$tma$ music while I was out this year? It was two days before Halloween. That...is too early. Normally, I do a pretty decent job of not putting myself around it too much, but this year it appears harder to escape from. Perhaps its omnipresence is due to the economy, which is fairly shitty from what I can discern. They certainly want each and every citizen to "deck the halls" with gizmos and cheap Chinese garbage in 2008... more than ever, it seems.

If I'm not hearing music, I'm hearing news... mostly about how "Black Friday" is going to (not) save us from financial ruin. Which is awesome. Now this is pure speculation on my part, but maybe some of the pressure put on consumers to stave off old man recession is making them a little tense. Sure, there is always some holiday violence, it's the American way. But a homicide? In a toy store? Two homicides! And a trampling death... People are serious this year, I guess.

If this time of year is getting you down in the dumps, I have a musical salve for your embittered soul. Almost every track here is an ass-shaker in one way or another, and all of them are freshly ripped from vinyl. It's the International Jazz Funk Prog Monster, gone on some kind of ennui mud-hole stomping tour. There isn't a carol in sight, so you may grab this without fear of jingling bells, eight tiny reindeer, or Santa.

[The Golden Bullet]

The Kazbek Orchestra - Ukrainian Folk Medley
Michael Liggins - Loaded to the Gills
James Brown - Think ( Live at the Apollo)
Can - I'm So Green
Coro A. Toscanini di Torino - Noi Vo Gliamo L'Uguaganza
Soul Diggers - Soul Dig Part 1
The 7 Sounds - The Sound of Soul
Green Milk from Planet Orange - Demagog
Harry Breuer & his Quartet - Minute Merengue
Manitas de Plata - Jova
Touré Kunda - Ne Nam' #1
Roosevelt Mathews with Billy Ball & the Upsetters - Tighten Up Tighter
Thee Headcoats - No Such Number
Kashmere Stage Band - Scorpio
Art Ensemble of Chicago - Odwalla/Theme (Live)
Erroll Garner - Bonnie Boy
Banda Tarapaca - Ay! Sargento y Cancion a Los Bonias Guindas
Pretty Boy - Bip Bop Bip
Rex Garvin and the Mighty Cravers - Emulsified
Faust - Du Weißt Schon
Funkadelic - Super Stupid

"I'd take a Bromo, but I can't stand the noise."

Look out! Old Beefeye is here, chopping up some choice musical chunks for you. Inner ear massage is the order of the day, with a veritable smörgåsbord of seriously sick songs, and savage, searing sounds. Check the tracklist if you have the doubts. The mere act of listening to this compilation ought to be enough to blast the old brown dinner out of your clogged, post-Thanksgiving guts. Don't be a'feared, help is here!

{throbthrobthrobthrobthrob}

zbignew karkowski
abcess: throbbing black werebeast
feedtime: small talk
floor: chelsea/pigs
black flag: fix me
amdi petersens arme`: enborger af samfundet
appi
nihilist: pinhead thought process
black randy and the metrosquad : i wanna be a nark
d.o.a.: no god no war
fuckface: raped shattered exiled
country teasers: devil on my back
buzzcocks: harmony in my head
night kings: night kings theme
pink lincolns: cotton mather
bauhaus : dark entries
the cramps: love me (live at cbgb's, halloween1978)
toast: code dread
skewbald: grand union
artimus pyle: paint it black
redrum: spreading the gospel
seein' red: nazi tuig
bitch magnet: big pining
the rip-offs: how do I feel
Lt. caramel
stack: six pack
tragedy: life?
crimpshrine : wake up
appendix : kateus
a mouse orchestra: a lump in your throat pt1

Alive With Pleasure(?)!

This post is all about bursting through the day with a double, nay... a quadruple barreled shotgun blast*. Wednesday can kiss my ass.

Today's mix is a thick, bloody rock and roll marmalade, with big chunks of gristle, bone, eyes, and crushed up window glass all throughout, evenly spread over the burnt toast of brutal life lessons and human suffering. Ordinary silverware and plates will not be enough to consume, or contain this mix. For your safety, use only asbestos gloves to handle this compilation. You'll need a large number of heavy-duty cloth napkins to clean yourself up, after you partake in this unholy continental breakfast of punishing horror... Also, be sure to keep the number of the poison control center on hand, just in case.

You have been warned. Bon Appétit!


{Thank Your Mother For the Rabbits…}

Deerhoof: 3/2
Registrators: I Call Your Name
Eater: No More (live ’77)
Dwarves: Free Cocaine
Umen: Dig It A Hole
Gasp: Eyes the Tentacle and Arachnid Know
Emperor: Curse You All Men
Erosion: 70th Floor
Rose Rose: Make Good My Escape (To Ichirow)
Voorhees: At My Expense
Black Flag: No Values
Forward: Never Lost Youself
Beguiled: She-Devil Rock
Pagans: Dead End America
Excruciating Terror: Suicide
Agnostic Front: Fight
Heresy: Genocide
Cosmic Psychos: Thank Your Mother for the Rabbits
Slight Slappers: Reflection
Fuckface: Politics of Falsehood
Los Crudos: No Estoy Convencide
Houses in Texas: Destiny of Dead Horses
Bastards: Shit for Brains
Killdozer: One for the People
Ed Gein’s Car: Too Old to Die Young
A Frames: Complication
Les Thugs: Femme Fatale
Dudman: Mass Game
Kitchener: Development
Funeral: Waiting for the Bomb Blast
Dead C: Scarey Nest
Corrupted: Other Side
Cd Crash:~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*a la Phantasm II, also there is no footage that I could easily find of the quad-shotgun in action. So you get single barrel graphics. Sorry!

Some greasy grabass ganked our guardian gargoyle!

The nerve of some people! To take a total stranger's twenty-two pound terrible temple dog is totally toothless! What a jerk! It makes me so mad, I see red! It makes me so mad, I'm all cramped up with anger! It makes me so mad, I put an exclamation point at the end of every sentence! Bastards!

"It's so easy to be wicked without knowing it, isn't it?"

I'm bringing it back on down again. I feel like I have been too hard on y'all, pushing my noisy tastes on y'all and such. This is gonna make it all better. It's quiet at times, raucous at others, but not too raucous. This stuff is all pure funk, jazz, and bebop...brusquely shaken, and infused with some international flavor. Perhaps it is too sleepy for a Monday, or even a Tuesday, but here it is anyway. In your respective faces, everyone! With love, from me.

Fantastic Life!

Bush Taxi Mali-Sanan Korya
Bix Beiderbecke-Blue River
Roger & the Gypsies-Pass the Hatchet pt.1
Alice Coltrane- Turiya and Ramakrishna
The Peps-My Love Looks Good On You
Odell Brown-Raise the Roof
WedeÌ €DJign-Antchi Ene'I
Raymond Scott-Good Air
Boscoe-Money Won't Save You
Kallibris-A2
Gnawa Music of Marrakesh-Toura Toura Tour Kelilah
Bezoz Hawaiian Orchestra-Pame Sti Honolulu
Cousin Leroy-Up the River
Wendy Carlos-William Tell Overture (Abridged)
Clave'-Coca Leaf
Mickey Baker-Do What You Do
Circle-Guarila
Super Soline D'Haiti-Noel
Dirty Three-Last Dance
Ken Nordine-Black
Sweet Violet Boys- They're Burning Down the House I was Brung Up In

Anniversary Time!

Here is a comp I made for my darling girlfriend six years ago, on this very day. It is ever so slightly edited for your enhanced enjoyment. Little did I know, five or so years later, we would be married! How nifty!

I Loves My Baby, My Baby Loves Me-

Dicks-Baby I Love You (live)
Louis Prima-When You're Smilin'/Sheik of Araby
Fred Lane and His Bolophonic Orchestra-I Talk to My Haircut
The Homosexuals-Neutron Lover
Son Mitume- Yo Te Voya Halercase
Little Willie John-I Like to See My Baby
The Jam- All Around the World
The Homosexuals-Hearts in Exile
Buzzcocks-Love You More (live)
Wolfgang Press- That Heat
The Ukrainians- Some Song
DJ Qbert-Wave Twisterz
Damned-Neat Neat Neat
Couch Flambeau-The Zoo is Cool
X-I Don't Wanna Go Out (live)
Wedding Present-Take Me
Wolfgang Press-Swing Like a Baby
Incredible String Band-Creation (part)
Hoagy Charmichael-Doctor, Lawyer and Indian Chief
Flat Duo Jets-My Life, My Love
Unrest-Yes, She is My Skinhead Girl

How Long Have We Been Together?

Happy Dating Anniversary, Honeybee! We have been together for twelve glorious years. This one doesn't count as much because of that whole marriage thingy we did. Or maybe it counts more, I don't know at this point. Twelve Years! Wow! I remember when we took that picture above. We had to get up like an hour before we went to bed or something, to get to the train station by 6:00 A.M. Ha! That sucked, bigtime! But you know what? I loves you ever so much.
I'll stop now. XOXOX

Punks is Hippies.

Ah, misspent youth. It was pretty fun, I must admit. Music was a big part of that. There is a certain something about the music we listen to when we're growing up. That music happens to be hardcore for me, especially the early stuff... that raw energy, the violence, the uncertainty of it all, it really gets me going. This is my classic rock, the soundtrack to my whole life after age 16. I love it. Being a nostalgic person in general, listening to old hardcore takes me on a time warp over the last twenty plus years, because I've never stopped listening to it. Sure, I developed my musical tastes, I enjoy all kinds of music... but there were never any other experiences quite like the ones I had early on, when it was all fresh and new.

I'm almost embarrassed to say it, but I am the same in this way, as any dirt-loving hippie throwback. Instead of Jefferson Airplane, Grateful Dead, and C.C.R., it's Negative Approach, Black Flag, and D.R.I. for me. Vintage tunes from my youth, they are my romanticized musical past. Instead of looking for that one perfect Dead show bootleg online, I look for Flipper demos. It's like listening to the world through rose colored ear plugs. "Remember back then maaan? It was all so coool back then, maaaan." It's the same.

Sorry, I prattle on. As much as I may want to grow my hair out so that I can put flowers in it when I listen to Minor Threat or the Feederz, I just don't (lazy, like a hippie!). I'd like to think that any other similarities I might have with my non-bathing, peace-loving brethren are so superficial that they don't warrant any further examination in this particular forum. Luckily I'd be right, because this is my blog, and I am truly free.

DJ Katastrophik made this mix a very long time ago. I present it to you now. Tracklist is in the comments section.

I must remember to go...

Yes, it has been a long night. No, I'm not gonna post any more music or commentary until I get some sleep. Maybe after lunch, whenever that might be. If you're bored you could go here. I still love this game, after all these years. So simple and great! Check out this little frustrating nugget, also. Oh, that damned cat!

"What I give form to in daylight is only one per cent of what I have seen in darkness."

Today I play the anti-DJ. Do the people want to dance? Hell no! They want to get as far away from this music as humanly possible. This is all metal, noise, and heaviness. It is not for when you are in a good mood and want to bop around. No, it's for when you are in a bad mood and need to clear a room. This is not the infamous "Get the Fuck Out" mix that we used to play at the end of the night at my place of employment (that mix once emptied out a full room in 8 seconds, a friend timed it). I am afraid that one is just too much for the likes of you. Some other time, perhaps. This one is a more musical journey than the G.T.F.O. mix. A long, unpleasant, occasionally vicious musical journey through some forbidding sonic frontiers. I was in a great mood and I listened to this twice today, I suppose that makes me some kind of masochist.

Chilly Reception at the Soiree-

Manticore-Liturgical Desecration
SPK-Ground Zero-Infinity Dose
Ultra-The Golden Shout
Krisiun-Obsession by Evil Force
Espendor Geometrico- La Ciudad de los Heroes Rojos
Gravitar-Blues for Charlie
Anne Gillis- #11 Untitled
Flying Testicle- Romance
Suffocation-Jesus Wept
Bullet in the Head-Jawbone of an Ass
Gravitar-Track2
N.W.W. -Muse
Erkin Koray and Ter-Mor Gorme Garibi
Jim Jones- Guyana Sunset

Several Sailing Scurvy Seadogs Sampling Some Sonic Skullduggery.

I have a large collection of music, from which I like to make these compilations. I obsess about them, probably because I used to be a delivery driver, and I needed something that I could listen to over, and over, and over... ad nauseum. It's important. The good ones kept me calm, which is good in a city where everyone is insane behind the wheel. They also kept me awake, which is good in a city blah blah insane. I make about one of these a week. This is an old habit that I have yet to tire of.

Thanks to technological advances (it was the tape age when I started doing this), I now listen to mix cds in the car, for the most part. Many of them end up unplayably scratched, or even crushed to bits on the floor of my filthy vehicle. This is because, when urge to drive overtakes me, I am both a lazy and brutal driver, like some kind of weresloth behind the wheel. Sometimes comps... just don't make it. As sad as that is, the ones that do make it are, in my opinion, usually pretty decent.

This is a mix that I have been messing around with for a couple of weeks now. I think this might be the version I stick with. I was looking for something less so, music that I could drive around to all afternoon and have it be sort of fun and not so gloomy. I did drive around with a slightly different mix of this for a week or so, and I had no road rage. It brings the fun for me, because it pleases my inner disaffected youth without being all metal or punk. Boy, did I fail on that gloomy part. Oh well, give me some crazy shit to hear and I'm happy.

Little Black Clouds #2.1

A Frames-Skeletons
NickCave y los BadSeeds-Deanna
Brainiac-Choke
The Ex-Burnsome
Boredoms-Super Are You
The Fall-Hotel Blöedel
Coil-Orca Not Lorca
Calle13-Algo con Sentido
DJ RomanPorsche-Blue Monday
Boris-1970
Fasaga-Schwächling
SonicYouth-Rowche Rumble
Country Teasers-I Don't Like People
Faust-Meer
Death in June-Fall Apart
Severed Heads-Spitoon Thud
Jessamine-Your Head's So Small It's Like a Tiny Light
Galaxy500-Temperature's Rising

A New Chapter in Dub.

Well, hello there! I have yet another tasty treat for you and yours. How many years ago did I put this comp together? Did I do it in 2002? 2003? I don't remember. At least five years ago. This mix actually exists (or has existed) in some form on the internet for almost that long. A friend of mine edited it into one track and put it up somewhere, I remember seeing it. To the best of my knowledge, I believe it has disappeared.

I like the dub music. Plain and simple. Long ago, I was once the used music buyer for a beloved local record store that has since passed on. Along with everything else, I bought almost every dub record that came in used from 1995 until 1999 for the store. More often than not, I would immediately turn around and sell these dub records to myself. This is not a HUGE stack of wax, mind you, but it is fairly respectable. A few may have slipped my desperate grasp and actually hit the floor in that time span, but as I was working six days a week mostly, and not much got by me, and I was/am kind of a dick in that way, I'm certain it was only a very few. And the ones that did get away probably weren't very good. Sorry, local dub record collectors...

Anyway, I have weird taste, I guess, and this is the dubbish compilation I made, weirdly, from said collection. Of course it's not all dub, there is a little bit of straight up reggae, some soundtrack music, and a pinch of noise. I've cut most of the dead air out, but I did no other cleanup. It has a bit of that vintage vinyl crackle to it, but that just makes it better in my humble opinion. Quite a few people I know have this already, and they think it's pretty neat. What do you think?

~Prince Jellyfish's Dubd'sco~

Bernard Hermann: God's Lonely Man
African Headcharge: Far Away Chant
Bunny Wailer: Fig Tree
Burning Spear: Black Wa Da Da
Scientist: VooDoo Curse
Evil Moisture: Spatter Gak
King Tubbys: The Easy Dub
Big Youth: Love Jah Jah Children
Rockers Allstars: Revolution Dub
Jackie Mittoo: Henry the Great
Carlton and the Shoes: I've Got Soul
U-Roy: Flashing My Whip
Sugar Minott: Progress Road Dub
N.W.W. Uncertain Nonsense
Augustus Pablo: A P Special
Prince Far I: Put It Out
The Upsetters: Curly Dub
Rockers Meet King Tubbys inna Firehouse
Prince Far I : Plant Up
Linton Kwesi Johnson: Making History
African Headcharge: Stebeni's Theme
David Jackman:Vault
Evil Moisture

Kindling to Stoke the Flames of Humanity.

Well, here we are. Again. This time around I'm going to bring the mellow down on you. By mellow I mean, softer than before...earlier, when it was really loud, that was all cool and shit. But now, it's quiet time. More contemplative. Less scrrrreeeeeech. Still, there are some challenging bits in the mix. I made this in late 2004, so it is a fine, post-election vintage. There is some rock here, because I like the rock (who doesn't?). Otherwise, it seems like I laid the Southern Gothic on pretty thick, as evidenced by the ugly, rough subject matter being strummed so sweetly at you. Murder, suicide, madness, the death of the human race, it all gets touched on in a folksy, down home sort of way.When the Louvin brothers sing about the killing fire raining from the skies, it makes you forget all about the horrible things you did in Knoxville, because now everyone is gonna die. Quick, grab my hand, let's run into the mushroom cloud together!

Kindling-

Howlin' Wolf: Backdoor Man
Flat Duo Jets: Madagascar
Flaming Lips: Mountainside
13th Floor Elevators: I Thought You Should Know
Heavenly Gospel Singers: Mean Old World
Rex: Blue Eyes You're Not
Louvin Brothers: Knoxville Girl
Handsome Family: The Forgotten Lake
Brownie McGee & Sonny Terry: Trouble in Mind
Nick Drake: River Man
The Birthday Party: Several Sins
Curtis & the Melody Cowboys: Mr. Blue
Little Willie John: Love, Life, & Money
The Minutemen: there ain't shit on t.v. tonight
Robert Johnson: Hellhound on My Trail
Coil: Car Rental
Country Teasers: Life is a Rehearsal
Mission of Burma: Execution
King Nawahi's Hawaiians: Hawaii Medley
Roy Newman & His Boys: Devil with the Devil
King Loser: Ten Rays
Louvin Brothers: Great Atomic Power
Mekons: Last Dance
Rev. J. M. Gates , Oh Death Where Is Thy Sting

Ladies and Gentlemen, I Present to You...

...the Greatest Rock and Roll Band in the WORLD...The Country Teasers! Seriously! Well, I like them a lot... and my enthusiasm should transfer to everyone else right? Right? Isn't that how the internet works? It doesn't? Well...that sucks.

In all of my trawling for tunes on the aforementioned internet, lo these last six or eight months, I have yet to come across any Country Teasers stuff other than the odd compilation track. I am here to fix that. This mix is something that I threw together a couple of years ago, a caustic compilation of crunchy, callous crooning and righteous rock and roll.

Their Fall worship is on display, as are their gangsta rap influences. These are distilled, purified at least ten times, dried out and ground into a fine powder. At which point they add whiskey and make a paste out of it. They then bombard the paste with gamma radiation until it makes a sound. This sound. Is it offensive? Maybe. Have I listened to this at least a hundred times? Yes I have.

Feels Like the Third Time.

Here is a picture of a dolly that I sculpted and put together. You enjoy that while I throw together another comp/mix for you. This one is coming in on the ambient side of the noisy coin. Sure there are some really irritating sounds on this thing, but for the most part it's like being unmoored and drifting on a raft made of birch wood and human skin...down a mostly frozen river, full of floating dead rats. No, scratch that. No rats. Let's leave it at the frozen river part. Yeah. Anyway, I gave a cd copy of this to a friend to listen to and he loves it. He plays it loud and then does other stuff while the cd does its thing.

You could do that...be like my friend. You too could be doing your dusting to the dulcet tones of Nazi UFO Commander, taking out the trash with fun fun Funeral Mist, launching your laundry into the Bay of Hopelessness while shuffling along with Sleephead. You get the general idea. Tracklist is below. Make it happen.

Little Black Clouds #1

Les Joyaux De La Princesse:Bei Einbrechender Nacht
Nazi UFO Commander:Retreat
Nueva Germania:Love is Over
Oln-Ba:Employment at Dead God
P Children:Truth Withheld
Severed Heads:Tiny Fingers
Tape Beatles:Green, Blue Beautiful Place/Whole New Animal
Siouxsie and the Banshees: Red Over White
Mort Art:Green Death
Skullflower:Blood Orange
Zr19.84:Embolium
Nurse With Wound:The Lonely Poisonous Mushroom
Opal:Hear the Wind Blow
Black Seas of Infinity:Spacial Exhumation
Birchville Cat Motel:Double Cascade Mini Fantasy
SleepHead:Bay of Hopelessness
Gas:Untitled 1
Funeral Mist:The God Supreme

I had so much fun the first time...

...I'm going to do this again. Just to let the warm happiness flood your senses. Feel that? That's joy. I have here another mix, and I have uploaded it for everyone's listening pleasure. This one is several months old, and pretty rockin', I'd say. Although, my "rockin'" seems to be everyone else's "excruciating", that is why I'm here with you. Caveat emptor. I love noise and hardcore and such. You either want this or you don't .That shitting sound coming out of your speakers? That's music. The tracklist is as follows:

Little Black Clouds # 3

The Cows: Cabin Man
Melt Banana: Too Rough to Scoop
Brainbombs: It's a Burning Hell
Fang: I Wanna Be on T.V.
Stretcheads: Chicken Fish
Hesskhe Yadalanah: Bless Cadaveric Bodies Experiences
Sick Things: Police
The Homosexuals: Walk Before Imitate
The Sound: Coldbeat (Live)
The Swans: Freak
The Swans: Right/Wrong
Shit and Shine: Cunts With Roses (pt.1)
Crossed Out: Vacuum
Prenatal Lust: Entertainment Tonight
Ed Gein's Car: My Life's a Game (live)
Dudman: Fascist Friday
Minutemen: The Punch Line
Rudimentary Peni: When You are a Martian Church
Stickmen With Rayguns: Grave City
Thrown Ups: Person in My Bowel (is sad)
Negative Approach: Pressure
Stretcheads: Long Faced German
Funeral Mist: Bringer of Terror
Boredoms: Acid Police
Missing Foundation: Martyr of the City
Negativland: When They Ring the Golden Bells
Corrupted: Nieve Segundo

Hello, these are for you!

Well, here I am. What's my mission now? Here, have this. This will buy me some time until I figure out where I'm going to go with this thing...this...this blog. Here is a linky, at the end of which is a compilation of music that I made for you last night. Why are you looking at me like that? I am a nice person. Go read the tracklist. It's good, I tell you. Cut me some slack. It is clearly worth ten minutes of your computer's valuable time, or however long it takes your computer to do things...whatever. You'll need to unpack the rar with Winrar or something. I wish I had a window to look out of.

Noise Complaint #1
Tape Beatles: c.-for frog
Boredoms: Star
People Like Us: Barbed Wire 4 People Like Us
Annie Anxiety: Cyanide Tears
p16d4: E & E
Skinny Puppy:Icebreaker
Nazi UFO Commander: Why We Fight
Esplendor Geometrico: Trans Umma
Tape Beatles: Behold a Republic
Missing Foundation: When Right was Wrong
Evolution Control Committee: I Don't Care
Sebadoh: Got It
Pain Teens: Lady of Flame
The National Hardwood Floor...: Looking for a...
Beherit: Hail Satanas
Severed Heads: Oscar's Grind
Gravitar: U.R.R.
Meat Beat Manifesto: Repulsion
The Fall: Couldn't Get Ahead
Assault: Object of the Attack
Spacemen 3: Call the Doctor
Alien Vampires: Neuroleptic Malignant Injection